Full-body Aloe Vera wraps not included

Remember waaaaaaaaaay back when we surfed on regular H2O?  When conquering water meant conquering our fears?  When riding waves translated to riding babes?

Those days are OVER, man.  Hella over, thanks to the geniuses that brought us Surfing H3O.

I can't feel my legs.

I can't feel my legs.

That has to be better than ol’ Surfing H2O, right?  I mean, H3O sounds pretty awesome.  It’s probably more watery water that has musical qualities to it.  Like, you could be riding this wave real fast and it’ll start playing Bon Jovi for you.

Actually, H3O is better known as “hydronium.”  It’s unstable and highly acidic.   Exactly the sort of compound you want to be underneath the plastic board on which you’re standing.

Surfing H3O!  It’s “totally tubular,” as in spending the rest of your life in an iron lung!

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